Re: OT: "Off-Topic Island"

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 22, 2017 9:53 am

syosnow94 wrote:.......so a week ago there were 2 very powerful storms on the horizon. The first was to be an epic rain and wind storm set to hit on the 23rd. The second was a powerfrul snow storm at the beginning of a major pattern change... at least a Godzilla+, and was considered a "lock" for the 28th. Guess which one is set to verify exactly as forecast and which one is now completely "off the radar"

Between the above and the fact that tomorrow's nor'easter is going to be slow-moving and with temps. in the upper 30's in late January I'm beginning to lose my mind quickly!!!

OTI sanitarium here I come, and this time put away the cocunuts and mangos. It's heroin for me!!!

Please make sure to get a temporary Visa from the acting Director of Tourism and Immigration.

I was just released from the Sanitarium on Friday and they are truly miracle workers. If tomorrows storm goes as currently forecast and I watch 4 inches of sleet fall that could have been 20 inches of snow, I will most likely be joining you at some time Wednesday.

After my release from my last visit to the Sanitarium I also had a 24 hour meeting with the snow Queen. She of course greeted me in her bikini made of snow and I greeted her with my hair dryer on high. I will leave the rest behind closed doors where they should stay. This is a PG forum. Should you desire a meeting with the Queen please check with Doc for her schedule next week.

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 22, 2017 10:18 am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI5VfVAMyEI

The revelry and cheer of OTI residents as massive amounts of tourist visa and Sanitarium income flooding the OTI Trasury in taxes as a result of Mainlaners flocking to flee the impending huge rainstorm and mild temperatures are evident in this short video shot a few days ago on various OTI locations.

Happy Days ...INDEED!!!!!

by **billg315** Sun Jan 22, 2017 5:55 pm

The Office of OTI Attorney General has been monitoring the situation at OTI Harbor. With temperatures at 50* and the strongest storm of the winter promising . . . rain and tropical storm winds????? ... here is some video I was able to capture at the Harbor this evening. All arrivals have been directed by OTI's chief law enforcement officer first to the Tourism and Visa Office and then to the Coconut Room.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVI7Lb3N90

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 22, 2017 6:28 pm

billg315 wrote:The Office of OTI Attorney General has been monitoring the situation at OTI Harbor. With temperatures at 50* and the strongest storm of the winter promising . . . rain and tropical storm winds????? ... here is some video I was able to capture at the Harbor this evening. All arrivals have been directed by OTI's chief law enforcement officer first to the Tourism and Visa Office and then to the Coconut Room.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UVI7Lb3N90

OTI's motto....."Give us your dry slotted, warm nosed,suppressed, snow deprived....".

Great work from the Attorney General's Office!!!!

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Jan 23, 2017 4:27 pm

billg315 wrote:
CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
Frank_Wx wrote:
track17 wrote:Thank you so much when do you expect the wind to end for the jersey shore?

The highest winds will stop overnight sometime. However, tomorrow morning they'll still gust to 30mph at times. Then by the afternoon they should get calm again.

syosnow94 wrote:Calling Docstox.....looks like Frank and rb9 are looking for a place in the OTI sanitarium

I've never been there. If the first week of February does not produce then I will need a Visa.

The Emperor does NOT need a VISA to get into OTI. Let's be clear.

The Office of OTI Attorney General will prepare proper security measures and island fanfare for the Emperor's arrival.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Jan 23, 2017 4:28 pm

docstox12 wrote:
rb924119 wrote:What even is OTI? lol I honestly have no idea, I just see it brought up every once in a while aha

You don't want to know my friend.Remember that sign in the movie The Wizard of Oz?"..."I'd turn back if I were you!"

by **billg315** Mon Jan 23, 2017 4:46 pm

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
docstox12 wrote:
rb924119 wrote:What even is OTI? lol I honestly have no idea, I just see it brought up every once in a while aha

You don't want to know my friend.Remember that sign in the movie The Wizard of Oz?"..."I'd turn back if I were you!"

I was sitting on the island the other day and I saw someone flying in the air spelling out in black smoke "Surrender Warmth."

by **Frank_Wx** Mon Jan 23, 2017 7:48 pm

I'm entering OTI for the first time in many months. Great men and women of the land, it's my honor to say I've declared OTI a National Landmark of NJ Strong. At some point this week, OTI will be removed from the OT forum and given its own space. I may even password protect this land to prevent beggars from entering, but I'll put that decision up for a vote among the faithful leaders. Please inform me of your decision in the near future. I appreciate your dedication in keeping this virtual kingdom active.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Jan 23, 2017 7:59 pm

Frank_Wx wrote:I'm entering OTI for the first time in many months. Great men and women of the land, it's my honor to say I've declared OTI a National Landmark of NJ Strong. At some point this week, OTI will be removed from the OT forum and given its own space. I may even password protect this land to prevent beggars from entering, but I'll put that decision up for a vote among the faithful leaders. Please inform me of your decision in the near future. I appreciate your dedication in keeping this virtual kingdom active.

I'm speechless, and that's hard to do.

This makes dealing with the most frustrating storm of the decade tolerable.

I will notify Doc to call an emergency meeting of Parliament if he hasn't done so already.

Thank you for acknowledging our existence your highness.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler

by Guest Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:05 pm

CODE RED. CODE RED!!!!! THE EMPEROR HAS APPEARED!!!!

I second the notion for an emergency meeting but for different reasons. I believe the Emperor is unraveling. Frozen balls of rain and talk of boundary layer issues have caused him to begin to utter psycho-babble about such things as 1. Italian Hazelnut spreads
2. California wines
3. acquiring visas
4. posting bogus snowfall maps

GENTLEMAN I AM CONCERNED. ESPECIALLY ABOUT #2 ABOVE. I'M THINKING HANNIBAL LECTOR REDUX. WE NEED TO ACT!!!

by **billg315** Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:09 pm

Frank_Wx wrote:I'm entering OTI for the first time in many months. Great men and women of the land, it's my honor to say I've declared OTI a National Landmark of NJ Strong. At some point this week, OTI will be removed from the OT forum and given its own space. I may even password protect this land to prevent beggars from entering, but I'll put that decision up for a vote among the faithful leaders. Please inform me of your decision in the near future. I appreciate your dedication in keeping this virtual kingdom active.

Emperor Frank!! Let me in my official capacity as OTI Attorney General be the first to welcome you on your visit to the Island and to tell you how honored we all are to be paid a visit by Your Majesty, Your Honor, King of Kings, Wonderful Cou . . oh, you get it already. The news of the declaration of the National Landmark is a great joy to the island and its people. Also luckily OTI News was on the scene to capture your arrival and meeting with me (the camera didn't capture your best side, but trust me you look much more handsome in person):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oxw5WPRzUOE

by **Frank_Wx** Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:54 pm

syosnow94 wrote:CODE RED. CODE RED!!!!! THE EMPEROR HAS APPEARED!!!!

I second the notion for an emergency meeting but for different reasons. I believe the Emperor is unraveling. Frozen balls of rain and talk of boundary layer issues have caused him to begin to utter psycho-babble about such things as 1. Italian Hazelnut spreads
2. California wines
3. acquiring visas
4. posting bogus snowfall maps

GENTLEMAN I AM CONCERNED. ESPECIALLY ABOUT #2 ABOVE. I'M THINKING HANNIBAL LECTOR REDUX. WE NEED TO ACT!!!

I'll act by advising you be placed in prison for obstruction of justice. You'll be fed nothing but rotting fruit that no longer serves purpose in the greater community. Attorney General, issue appropriate punishment for this peasant.

billg315 wrote:
Frank_Wx wrote:I'm entering OTI for the first time in many months. Great men and women of the land, it's my honor to say I've declared OTI a National Landmark of NJ Strong. At some point this week, OTI will be removed from the OT forum and given its own space. I may even password protect this land to prevent beggars from entering, but I'll put that decision up for a vote among the faithful leaders. Please inform me of your decision in the near future. I appreciate your dedication in keeping this virtual kingdom active.

Emperor Frank!! Let me in my official capacity as OTI Attorney General be the first to welcome you on your visit to the Island and to tell you how honored we all are to be paid a visit by Your Majesty, Your Honor, King of Kings, Wonderful Cou . . oh, you get it already. The news of the declaration of the National Landmark is a great joy to the island and its people. Also luckily OTI News was on the scene to capture your arrival and meeting with me (the camera didn't capture your best side, but trust me you look much more handsome in person):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oxw5WPRzUOE

The night prior to this video I was hosting a soiree with virtual leaders across the lands. I entrust you'll keep this video private as releasing to the mainland could cause people to think differently of me.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:58 pm

syosnow94 wrote:CODE RED. CODE RED!!!!! THE EMPEROR HAS APPEARED!!!!

I second the notion for an emergency meeting but for different reasons. I believe the Emperor is unraveling. Frozen balls of rain and talk of boundary layer issues have caused him to begin to utter psycho-babble about such things as 1. Italian Hazelnut spreads
2. California wines
3. acquiring visas
4. posting bogus snowfall maps

GENTLEMAN I AM CONCERNED. ESPECIALLY ABOUT #2 ABOVE. I'M THINKING HANNIBAL LECTOR REDUX. WE NEED TO ACT!!!

Frank did mention something about password protecting the Island. It might not be a bad idea, to you know, keep out the unstable. Not you of course Syos.

You do have your VISA papers with you, yes? Just asking.

Where's the Director of Security when I need him, AWOL again.

by **billg315** Mon Jan 23, 2017 9:02 pm

Frank_Wx wrote:
syosnow94 wrote:CODE RED. CODE RED!!!!! THE EMPEROR HAS APPEARED!!!!

I second the notion for an emergency meeting but for different reasons. I believe the Emperor is unraveling. Frozen balls of rain and talk of boundary layer issues have caused him to begin to utter psycho-babble about such things as 1. Italian Hazelnut spreads
2. California wines
3. acquiring visas
4. posting bogus snowfall maps

GENTLEMAN I AM CONCERNED. ESPECIALLY ABOUT #2 ABOVE. I'M THINKING HANNIBAL LECTOR REDUX. WE NEED TO ACT!!!

I'll act by advising you be placed in prison for obstruction of justice. You'll be fed nothing but rotting fruit that no longer serves purpose in the greater community. Attorney General, issue appropriate punishment for this peasant.

billg315 wrote:
Frank_Wx wrote:I'm entering OTI for the first time in many months. Great men and women of the land, it's my honor to say I've declared OTI a National Landmark of NJ Strong. At some point this week, OTI will be removed from the OT forum and given its own space. I may even password protect this land to prevent beggars from entering, but I'll put that decision up for a vote among the faithful leaders. Please inform me of your decision in the near future. I appreciate your dedication in keeping this virtual kingdom active.

Emperor Frank!! Let me in my official capacity as OTI Attorney General be the first to welcome you on your visit to the Island and to tell you how honored we all are to be paid a visit by Your Majesty, Your Honor, King of Kings, Wonderful Cou . . oh, you get it already. The news of the declaration of the National Landmark is a great joy to the island and its people. Also luckily OTI News was on the scene to capture your arrival and meeting with me (the camera didn't capture your best side, but trust me you look much more handsome in person):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oxw5WPRzUOE

The night prior to this video I was hosting a soiree with virtual leaders across the lands. I entrust you'll keep this video private as releasing to the mainland could cause people to think differently of me.

My officers have entered the OTI Newsroom and seized the video and taken some of the news staff into custody for questioning. It has been destroyed and cannot be provided to anyone on the Mainland.

As for Syo, in addition to enforcing the punishments outlined Emperor, I also hereby will require him to view a map tomorrow morning showing the snow totals not just from this storm if the precipitation had been all snow, but the projected snow totals for his back yard added up from every near-miss storm in the last two years.

by Guest Mon Jan 23, 2017 9:54 pm

Not the snow map please. Anything but the snow map. savior

by **billg315** Mon Jan 23, 2017 10:05 pm

syosnow94 wrote:Not the snow map please. Anything but the snow map.

It's enough torture to drive any of us crazy. lol!

by **Math23x7** Mon Jan 23, 2017 10:11 pm

syosnow94 wrote:Not the snow map please. Anything but the snow map.

James, when you get freed from OTI Prison, we need to meet up at Rollin Greens. You may need some good drinks to ease the pain. But even on OTI, drinking and driving is not permitted.

by **docstox12** Tue Jan 24, 2017 2:49 am

Residents and Officials of OTI and the Great and Powerful Emperor Frank....my pressing duties at the OTI Sanitarium, comprising consecutive double shifts as a result of model mayhem causing a massive influx of Mainlanders, precluded me from participating in the arrival ceremonies of the Emperor and subsequent discussion of the future Of OTI.

As we are well aware,OTI's exisits as a result of the indulgence of you, Dear Emperor, and my own personal opinion on the matters concerning OTI's future, rest entirely at the whim and behest of yourself, Great One.However, we are a Parliamentary Participatory Democracy, and the matters you propose will be discussed intensively in a special session of OTI Parliament today.First on the agenda will no doubt be the rubber stamping of declaring yesterday,January 23, Anno Domani 2107, a National Holiday for being placed in the NJ Stong's National Landmark's Registry.We are humbled and awed at this magnificent gesture at your recognizing and rewarding us with this honor.

I am sure Parliament, after brief debate and discussion, will be amenable to any proposal, you Dear Emperor ,have in mind for your Island territory.

I remain:

Docstox
Director of Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

by **SNOW MAN** Tue Jan 24, 2017 6:17 am

I know I haven't posted a lot lately and it's because of some health issues that I'm having and also dealing with some health issues my Mom is having. Between the two plus work I just haven't had a lot of time to post. But that doesn't mean I've let my duties as Security Officer go either. I see my fellow co-founder CP of our beautiful island wants to relieve me of my duties. I very disappointed about this.
I've been working undercover doing back ground checks on all of these new Mainlander folks that are streaming in because of our crappy Winter season so far. They all seem to have no skeletons in there closets as far as I can tell. So to them I say WELCOME to our beloved island. I see even the EMPEROR made a visit to the OTI. WOW !!!
Oh well let me put my fake nose/glasses and mustache on and go back undercover to do my duties as Security Officer. Remember I'll be watching so please try to behave yourselves or you could be banished to the Mainland forever and that would be awful. Especially the way this Winter has been going so far, but I do have faith that our EMPEROR will give us the WHITE GOLD we all crave.

SNOW MAN
Security Officer

by **docstox12** Tue Jan 24, 2017 7:34 am

SNOW MAN wrote:I know I haven't posted a lot lately and it's because of some health issues that I'm having and also dealing with some health issues my Mom is having. Between the two plus work I just haven't had a lot of time to post. But that doesn't mean I've let my duties as Security Officer go either. I see my fellow co-founder CP of our beautiful island wants to relieve me of my duties. I very disappointed about this.
I've been working undercover doing back ground checks on all of these new Mainlander folks that are streaming in because of our crappy Winter season so far. They all seem to have no skeletons in there closets as far as I can tell. So to them I say WELCOME to our beloved island. I see even the EMPEROR made a visit to the OTI. WOW !!!
Oh well let me put my fake nose/glasses and mustache on and go back undercover to do my duties as Security Officer. Remember I'll be watching so please try to behave yourselves or you could be banished to the Mainland forever and that would be awful. Especially the way this Winter has been going so far, but I do have faith that our EMPEROR will give us the WHITE GOLD we all crave.

SNOW MAN
Security Officer

SNOW MAN, with the Emperor visiting and you returning to report in from your undercover duties, OTI is joyous and celebratory! Parliament is going to schedule a session where the Emperor will speak, and at that session, I will award you the Bannana Medal of Honor with Coconut Cluster to show our Islands appreciation of the very dangerous cloak and dagger espionage on suspected Mainland Terrorists (this that spread rumors of major blizzards hitting the Mainland and significantly lowering Tourist Visa applications on OTI).I am sure our esteemed Director of the Treasury and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler CP will be thrilled at your return and all discussion of you being releieved of your duties will be shelved.

Welcome back!!!!!!!

by **Frank_Wx** Tue Jan 24, 2017 9:01 am

docstox12 wrote:Residents and Officials of OTI and the Great and Powerful Emperor Frank....my pressing duties at the OTI Sanitarium, comprising consecutive double shifts as a result of model mayhem causing a massive influx of Mainlanders, precluded me from participating in the arrival ceremonies of the Emperor and subsequent discussion of the future Of OTI.

As we are well aware,OTI's exisits as a result of the indulgence of you, Dear Emperor, and my own personal opinion on the matters concerning OTI's future, rest entirely at the whim and behest of yourself, Great One.However, we are a Parliamentary Participatory Democracy, and the matters you propose will be discussed intensively in a special session of OTI Parliament today.First on the agenda will no doubt be the rubber stamping of declaring yesterday,January 23, Anno Domani 2107, a National Holiday for being placed in the NJ Stong's National Landmark's Registry.We are humbled and awed at this magnificent gesture at your recognizing and rewarding us with this honor.

I am sure Parliament, after brief debate and discussion, will be amenable to any proposal, you Dear Emperor ,have in mind for your Island territory.

I remain:

Docstox
Director of Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

Director,

I will motion members of this Kingdom to vote whether they believe a password should be required to enter the land. For those in favor, say I. Those against, say Nay. The votes will be reviewed the end of this week. Please gather as many participants as possible.

Frank_Wx
Emperor

by Guest Tue Jan 24, 2017 9:04 am

As a member of OTI who is currently jailed I would like to know if prisoners get a vote?

by **docstox12** Tue Jan 24, 2017 9:08 am

syosnow94 wrote:As a member of OTI who is currently jailed I would like to know if prisoners get a vote?

I can't answer this at the moment Jimmy without consulting Parliament but I will send over a cake baked with a file in it.

Regards

Docstox

by **docstox12** Tue Jan 24, 2017 9:09 am

As per the Emperor's request, I cast my vote "I" for password protection of our Island!

OTI Residents, please tabulate your votes.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Tue Jan 24, 2017 9:12 am

syosnow94 wrote:As a member of OTI who is currently jailed I would like to know if prisoners get a vote?

Non Citizens do not get a vote. My understanding is you are still on OTI per an extended Visa issued by our missing Director of Immigration and Tourism Taffy. Please apply for fast track citizenship approval at the OTI tourism and Immigration Services upon your release from OTI Security. As soon as our returned and beloved Director of Security SnowMan finishes his enhanced interrogations including forced snow mapping, you can apply for citizenship.

Good luck to you during your interrogation, I'm hoping you survive. We could use a ninth citizen on OTI and I feel you would add diversity to the group. We need a mentally unstable citizen and you would surely fit the bill. No offense intended. If you feel you are being treated unfairly please register your complaint with Attorney General Billg.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler

Vote I for password protection of the Island, although I do need a further explanation of what exactly that would do. We don't want to keep tourists away as that is the lifesblood of OTI.

by **billg315** Tue Jan 24, 2017 10:58 am

I vote I. unless it will impede tourist activity as that is critical to our economy (particularly if that switch to cow-based currency ever happens).

by **billg315** Tue Jan 24, 2017 11:47 am

The Office of OTI Attorney General hereby files the following motion with the Supreme Weather Court for a cease and desist Order against the defendants in the matter of:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

As there is pending litigation against defendants in this case regarding the criminal under-measuring of snow at Central Park, any action taken by those defendants to further agitate, aggravate, enrage, or otherwise get a rise out of the People of OTI at-large, and CPcantmeasuresnow in particular, can only be construed as harassment of the victims in this case.
Harassment of the victims of this case is, in itself, a criminal act, and also an act of Contempt of this Court. Therefore it should not and cannot be tolerated by this Court.
This Office submits to the court that yesterday, during one of the more frustrating winter nor'easters of all time -- a storm that dumped significant rain and sleet accompanied by powerful winds, yet for most people nary a flake of snow despite a High in Canada and temperatures just above freezing -- the defendants put out a harassing communication.
That communication recorded 1.68" of RAINFALL in CPK, despite surrounding reporting stations reporting significantly less (to wit: JFK - 1.24"; LGA - 1.21"; NWK - 1.61"; White Plains - 0.89"). To put in perspective, using a simplified 10:1 snow-to-liquid equivalent ratio, CPK would have reported nearly 17" of snow while JFK and LGA reported just over 12" and White Plains 9".
How can it be, that a station that REGULARLY reports LESS snowfall than surrounding stations, can suddenly report significantly MORE rainfall? Unless, I submit, this was done specifically to aggravate the victims in this pending court matter. It is harassment pure and simple.
This Office therefore moves for:
1. Punitive penalties against defendants for this contemptuous harassment; and
2. That this evidence be admitted as part of the underlying case to show that the snow measurements are NOT the product of some unexplained atmospheric phenomena that produces less precipitation in CPK; and finally
3. A cease and desist Order barring CPK officials from reporting measurements of anything - whether it be snow, rain, sleet, or d*** measurements, as clearly nothing measured there can be trusted.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg
Attorney General of OTI
p.s. d*** refers to Dew Point measurements

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