Re: OT: "Off-Topic Island"

by **SNOW MAN** Thu Jan 26, 2017 6:48 am

Good morning Doc and Cp. I've decided to release Syo from the OTI jail. I think he will be a good citizen for our island. Now he may have a occasional outburst on how we missed out on a snowstorm or how crappy our Winter season is going so far. But that's what the OTI Sanitarium is for. I've stayed there myself a few times to get my mind right and I must say the care I got was excellent.

I'm still working on Greslig's background check and as of now I haven't found anything yet. I would like to dig a little deeper though just to make sure he is clean before we appoint him as Director of Culinary Arts and Hospitality. I think he will be an excellent choice for this position. I will let you know when I've completed my investigation.

I would like to address the password issue. My vote is nay for this. I think it would only deter people from visiting our wonderful island. I think we should let people come and see our beautiful paradise freely and then let them decide if they want to become a citizen. Of course anyone who decides to become part of our OTI nation would have to go through the background check procedures to become a full fledge islander. I think having a password would hurt our community from growing.

As for the communication issue. I think Cp's idea of adding an extra 50 yards of string to the coconut phone is good. But remember I'm not always near my coconut communicator because I'm always investigating indiscretions that take place on the island. So here's my plan, if I don't answer the coconut method take a Conch Shell and blow into it with three short bursts and that will let me know to get in touch with the Parliament. Let me know if this is acceptable.
Oh well let me get back to my duties of investigating and torturing would be offenders. Whoops did I say torturing I meant interrogating suspects and offenders. I've decided to change my title a little. I will be adding Chief to it as long as it's alright with Docstox Director of Parliament and the other ruling powers.

SNOW MAN
Chief Security Officer for the OTI

P.S. Has anyone seen my ice pick and sharpened ice chopper. If so please let me know because these are vital tools for my work as Chief Security Officer. Boy I like the way that sounds. Twisted Evil

by **docstox12** Thu Jan 26, 2017 7:32 am

Chief Security Officer SNOW MAN. Perhaps this may help you in your quest for more efficient communications vis a vis OTI security measures:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjgmnA58jM0

I am leaning towards the opinion more strongly of NOT password protecting the Island.The ability of tourists to freely enter the Island would definitely be hindered.At this juncture, I will vote NAY alongside you and see where we are as other dignitaries and citizens cast their vote.

Good new on Syos! I feel he is a very valuable addition as a citizen here and I have no problem with the occasional outbursts of anger and dismay at Mainland snow deficiency.I had special professionals at the Sanitarium help Syos in this matter by offering Mental Mantras to use in the event another huge rainstorm should hit his area of the Mainland.To control his anger he would repeat over and over ..."pins and needles, needles and pins, a happy man is a man that grins..." and "every day in every way I am getting better!".

Grseligs offer to head the post of Director of Culinary Arts and Hospitality in indeed intriguing! After your thorough investigation and vetting, I will bring this matter up before Parliament as per Treasury Director CP's suggestion.

May I add at this juncture that OTI is now bustling with energy and enthusiasm, and the future is looking bright.

by **Grselig** Thu Jan 26, 2017 11:42 am

Snow, rest assured that I have never been caught knowingly committing a crime. I think I saw your ice pick. I will make sure that it is returned to you in pristine condition.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Fri Jan 27, 2017 4:34 am

Grselig wrote:Snow, rest assured that I have never been caught knowingly committing a crime. I think I saw your ice pick. I will make sure that it is returned to you in pristine condition.

Thunder snow things you may not consider a crime in the Mainland world are grievous unforgivable crimes against humanity in the OTI world. Consider for instance some of the mainland world who say things like "if February doesn't work out I'm hoping for an early spring". On OTI a musing like that Would get you 10-20. Another Mainlnader saying "I consider March a spring month, "I just want 60's and springtime by then". Not only is that saying factually false, the average high temperature doesn't even hit 60 until April 12 in NYC but SNOWMAN has killed people for less. Consider the man investigating you mocked me when I posted the temperatures in yahansk Siberia which were featuring endless days of -60 degree highs and I noted how does anyone live there, our chief security officer replied "whimp, that's car wash weather for me". This is what your up against, he's tough but fair. We don't care what your race, religion or color is on OTI but if you're not a full fledged hater of anything to do with warm weather or rain you don't stand a chance and you will be found out.

Good luck to you future Director of Culinary and fine arts anything I've seen in your past shows a true dedication to cold and snow. But if you have any doubts just ask yourself if I lived through the summer of 1815 and my house was buried by a foot of snow in June with frost in a July and August and I was probably going to starve because all of my crops were ruined would you be happy or sad? If the answer is happy congratulates Director Thunder snow. However if the answer is sad you have committed a crime against OTI in your heart

Good luck to you, I hear Snowmans snow mapping interrogation has eased up over the years.

CP CANTMEASURESNOW
GRAND HIGH EXALTED MYSTIQUE RULER
DIRECTOR OF THE TREASURY

by **docstox12** Fri Jan 27, 2017 5:39 am

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
Grselig wrote:Snow, rest assured that I have never been caught knowingly committing a crime. I think I saw your ice pick. I will make sure that it is returned to you in pristine condition.

Thunder snow things you may not consider a crime in the Mainland world are grievous unforgivable crimes against humanity in the OTI world. Consider for instance some of the mainland world who say things like "if February doesn't work out I'm hoping for an early spring". On OTI a musing like that Would get you 10-20. Another Mainlnader saying "I consider March a spring month, "I just want 60's and springtime by then". Not only is that saying factually false, the average high temperature doesn't even hit 60 until April 12 in NYC but SNOWMAN has killed people for less. Consider the man investigating you mocked me when I posted the temperatures in yahansk Siberia which were featuring endless days of -60 degree highs and I noted how does anyone live there, our chief security officer replied "whimp, that's car wash weather for me". This is what your up against, he's tough but fair. We don't care what your race, religion or color is on OTI but if you're not a full fledged hater of anything to do with warm weather or rain you don't stand a chance and you will be found out.

Good luck to you future Director of Culinary and fine arts anything I've seen in your past shows a true dedication to cold and snow. But if you have any doubts just ask yourself if I lived through the summer of 1815 and my house was buried by a foot of snow in June with frost in a July and August and I was probably going to starve because all of my crops were ruined would you be happy or sad? If the answer is happy congratulates Director Thunder snow. However if the answer is sad you have committed a crime against OTI in your heart

Good luck to you, I hear Snowmans snow mapping interrogation has eased up over the years.

CP CANTMEASURESNOW
GRAND HIGH EXALTED MYSTIQUE RULER
DIRECTOR OF THE TREASURY

by **Grselig** Fri Jan 27, 2017 7:37 am

docstox12 wrote:
CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
Grselig wrote:Snow, rest assured that I have never been caught knowingly committing a crime. I think I saw your ice pick. I will make sure that it is returned to you in pristine condition.

Thunder snow things you may not consider a crime in the Mainland world are grievous unforgivable crimes against humanity in the OTI world. Consider for instance some of the mainland world who say things like "if February doesn't work out I'm hoping for an early spring". On OTI a musing like that Would get you 10-20. Another Mainlnader saying "I consider March a spring month, "I just want 60's and springtime by then". Not only is that saying factually false, the average high temperature doesn't even hit 60 until April 12 in NYC but SNOWMAN has killed people for less. Consider the man investigating you mocked me when I posted the temperatures in yahansk Siberia which were featuring endless days of -60 degree highs and I noted how does anyone live there, our chief security officer replied "whimp, that's car wash weather for me". This is what your up against, he's tough but fair. We don't care what your race, religion or color is on OTI but if you're not a full fledged hater of anything to do with warm weather or rain you don't stand a chance and you will be found out.

Good luck to you future Director of Culinary and fine arts anything I've seen in your past shows a true dedication to cold and snow. But if you have any doubts just ask yourself if I lived through the summer of 1815 and my house was buried by a foot of snow in June with frost in a July and August and I was probably going to starve because all of my crops were ruined would you be happy or sad? If the answer is happy congratulates Director Thunder snow. However if the answer is sad you have committed a crime against OTI in your heart

Good luck to you, I hear Snowmans snow mapping interrogation has eased up over the years.

CP CANTMEASURESNOW
GRAND HIGH EXALTED MYSTIQUE RULER
DIRECTOR OF THE TREASURY

I FIND IT TRULY OFFENSIVE THAT A PERSON WOULD WANT MARCH TO BE REMOTELY WARM. MAKES ME SICKER THAN A RABID DOG WITH DYSENTRY ON HIS DEATHBED. MARCH, IN MY OPINION, OUGHT TO BE COLD WITH MOUNDS AND MOUNDS OF SNOW. JANUARY RAIN STORMS SHOULD BE OUTLAWED AND I WOULD VOTE FOR ANY RULER WHO CAN INVENT A WAY TO MODIFY COLD RAIN STORMS INTO GLAMOROUS WINTER WONDERLANDS COMPLETE WITH ICICLES LACED SNOW MOUNTAINS. A 50% TAX ON IMPORTS CAN FUND SUCH IMPORTANT GROUNDBREAKING RESEARCH. AS A MATTER OF FACT....BAN SUMMER...BAN SPRING.... JUST MAKE COLD COLD SNOWLY WINTERS 365 DAYS OF THE YEAR!!!!!! I DON'T WANT A 30% CHANCE OF SNOW. I WANT A 500% CHANCE OF SNOW. NOW!!!!!! IM DONE RANTING. THIS DRY WEATHER HAS MADE ME SICK.

by **Grselig** Fri Jan 27, 2017 8:32 am

....And another thing. I find it ridiculous that Russia sends its criminals to Siberia. That's not punishment. The real criminals should be sent to rot in Hawaii.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Fri Jan 27, 2017 8:30 pm

Grselig wrote:....And another thing. I find it ridiculous that Russia sends its criminals to Siberia. That's not punishment. The real criminals should be sent to rot in Hawaii.

Just for the above paragraph alone I believe we can suspend the vetting. I'm sure our Chief Security Officer would agree after he sees your hardline stance against warm weather.

Welcome to the OTI federal beauracy Directory of the Culinary Arts? It's been a couple of pages now so I'm not sure I got your title correct. Please adjust accordingly if I did not.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
GHEMR
Director of the Treasury.

by **docstox12** Sat Jan 28, 2017 6:36 am

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
Grselig wrote:....And another thing. I find it ridiculous that Russia sends its criminals to Siberia. That's not punishment. The real criminals should be sent to rot in Hawaii.

Just for the above paragraph alone I believe we can suspend the vetting. I'm sure our Chief Security Officer would agree after he sees your hardline stance against warm weather.

Welcome to the OTI federal beauracy Directory of the Culinary Arts? It's been a couple of pages now so I'm not sure I got your title correct. Please adjust accordingly if I did not.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
GHEMR
Director of the Treasury.

I concur 100%.Grselig's loyalty to cold and snow cannot be questioned with an amazing statement like that.Parliament hereby fully accepts Grselig in his Culinary post and I am sure he will be beginning his duties enthusiasticaly by investigating OTI restaurants and eateries as well as setting dietary standards for OTI residents.

The addition of these two outstanding citizens, Billg and Grselig to governmental positions, humbles me, your Director of Parliament, and it shows the world we are growing and improving in every way!To cap these heart uplifting ( I dare not say heart WARMING) events, the Long Range Crew, lead by our all powerful and knowing Emperor Frank, predicts multiple snow and cold possibilities for the month of February.Perhaps the reign of terror, 20 something months of above normal temperatures, will finally be shattered!Should that event occur, Mar 1 will be declared a National Holiday in OTI.

by **Grselig** Sat Jan 28, 2017 10:18 am

It is an honor to be associated with decent honorable people. I truly believe,for the reasons Doc has illustrated, and with the quality of citizens, that OTI will thrive. Long live subzero and snow!

by **billg315** Sat Jan 28, 2017 10:22 am

PRELIMINARY INJUNCTION

The following parties,

NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

Are hereby Ordered to refrain from any purposeful, knowing, reckless, or negligent undermeasurement of snow during any February 2017 snow events.
Whereas Emperor Frank has projected many opportunities for that most wonderful and joyous of events - a snowstorm - during the month of February; and
Whereas, ample evidence of systemic and repetitive undermeasurement of snow by the above parties has been provided;
Therefore it is necessary to stop them in advance from this activity by issuing a preliminary injunction. Should they violate this Order they will be punished as follows:
1. Forfeiture of all mangos and coconuts in their possession;
2. They must stand on hot coals one hour for every 0.1" of snow they undercount; and
3. They will be put on duty of cleaning Emperor Frank's mangos, whenever the Emperor needs clean mangos; and
4. ANY AND ALL additional consequences Snow Man sees fit to impose as OTI Chief Security Officer.
Respectfully submitted,
Billg
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 29, 2017 2:16 pm

billg315 wrote:PRELIMINARY INJUNCTION

The following parties,

NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

Are hereby Ordered to refrain from any purposeful, knowing, reckless, or negligent undermeasurement of snow during any February 2017 snow events.
Whereas Emperor Frank has projected many opportunities for that most wonderful and joyous of events - a snowstorm - during the month of February; and
Whereas, ample evidence of systemic and repetitive undermeasurement of snow by the above parties has been provided;
Therefore it is necessary to stop them in advance from this activity by issuing a preliminary injunction. Should they violate this Order they will be punished as follows:
1. Forfeiture of all mangos and coconuts in their possession;
2. They must stand on hot coals one hour for every 0.1" of snow they undercount; and
3. They will be put on duty of cleaning Emperor Frank's mangos, whenever the Emperor needs clean mangos; and
4. ANY AND ALL additional consequences Snow Man sees fit to impose as OTI Chief Security Officer.
Respectfully submitted,
Billg
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

Incredible work, Chief Justice.

I expect the OTI coffers will be filled shortly and with those expectations in mind I am preparing an infrastructure bill for The Director of Parliament to introduce into legislation at the next legislative meeting.

We still have several important positions to fill here and still have not heard from the nominees about filling these positions.

Math23X7 as Director of Technology or Director of the Budget, whichever he deems himself more suitable.

Syos for Director of Mental Health. I believe people that have been to the edge and back should head up this position and who has been to both places and back more often than Syos. This is predicated on his stay at the OTI Sanitarium proving successful, and our Chief Security Officer leaves him capable of coherent thought after his thorough interrogation. And of course after he applys for and is vetted and approved for citizenship on OTI.

Our Executive positions as they currently stand:

Director of Parliament (for life) and Director of the OTI Sanitarium - Docstox
Director of the Treasury and Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler (GHEMR) for short - CP Cantmeasuresnow
Chief Security Officer - Snowman
Deposed Monarch - Mugs (who last visited the Island about the same time Taffy did, could they have run off together?)
Director of Tourism and Immigration - Taffy (missing for almost a year not including one cameo)
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor - Billg
Director of Culinary Arts - Gries, more commonly referred to on OTI as Thundersnow.

If I have gotten any titles wrong, please correct them asap. Once Billg wins our case gold engravings with everyone's title and name will be sent to your huts, along with hammocks if we can ever get them delivered.

Should anyone else want to apply for citizenship on OTI please send me a written statement (I'm the acting Director of Immigration until Tafffy returns) on why you are applying. Your statement should end with the OTI National anthem written out in long hand at the bottom. We are being promised by the EMPEROR himself Frank, and the assistant EMPEROR Sroc of a separate section on the NJ Strong Forum soon and applications for Visa's, green cards, and citizenship are expected to grow ten fold when that occurs. Unlike other countries around the world we welcome people of all race, religions and colors on OTI but we reject anyone that has ever waxed poetic for warm springs, summer, and rain. If you ever have, or ever will please don't waste our time by applying.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
GHEMR

by Guest Sun Jan 29, 2017 3:25 pm

Dear OTI PARLIAMENT PRESSING MATTER....EMERGENCY!!!

After spending several days in jail followed by a brief (but very enjoyable) stay at the sanitarium, I am being detained by members of the ACLU at JFK International Airport. Terminal 4!!! I was released from the sanitarium and was filling out my paperwork for a visa and citizenship into OTI when I caught a glimpse of Emperor Frank's snow confidence index once again being adjusted downwards. I began to feel myself slowly spiraling into a deep dark place when I remembered the phrases Docstox told me to repeat to myself. I jumped into my American made car and drove to the airport, passport in hand and was going to book a flight to Siberia for some winter weather enjoyment. Upon my arrival at the terminal I stumbled upon some people protesting the enforcement of American immigration laws for once, and when I commented to them about how childish they were behaving I was blindsided by a millennial in a ski mask. Next thing I knew I was injected with a needle and am currently being held against my will by some lawyers with blue bow ties and clown hats in a room inside the terminal. I NEED HELP. I AM ASKING Billg135 TO IMMEDIATELY PROCURE MY RELEASE AND SUBSEQUENT ADMITTANCE INTO OTI SOCIETY. I also request a position as head OTI CIA officer where I can work to ensure the safety of our peaceful law-abiding society while planning my revenge on the people who violated my civil rights as an American.

Please respond ASAP as I fear for my safety as well as that of my country.
respectfully,
James aka Syosnow94

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 29, 2017 3:56 pm

I Agree with all of the above except creating a position of Head of OTI CIA officer. I see this as a direct overlap of the duties done by our Cheif Security Officer Snowman. Let's get you out of your current predicament and then we can concern ourselves with citizenship hearings followed by a possible cabinet level position.

I have alerted our Chief Justice and Director of Parliament. Unfortunately since you have not yet completed VISA or citizenship applications I'm not sure of how much assistance we can be. That of course will be left to our Chief Justice, and a finer Chief Justice no imaginary Island nation in cyber space has ever known.

So I take this as a no to my proposal to make you the Director of Mental Health on OTI? What a shame you seemed like a natural for the position.

With no further ado I am:
CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler
Current acting Director of Tourism and Immigration

by Guest Sun Jan 29, 2017 4:02 pm

Visa and citizenship! HOW? I'm being held and drugged. Once you guys assure me that you'll get me out I will do whatever is asked like any good soldier. Including your proposal to make me Director of Mental Health. Just get me the hell outta here!!

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 29, 2017 4:10 pm

syosnow94 wrote: Visa and citizenship! HOW? I'm being held and drugged. Once you guys assure me that you'll get me out I will do whatever is asked like any good soldier. Including your proposal to make me Director of Mental Health. Just get me the hell outta here!!

I'm giving it my best shot Syos, unfortunately as the Director of The Treasury I do not have the authority to call a meeting of Parliament, only Doc does. I suppose I can use my power as the Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler, but to tell you the Gods honest truth I'm not sure where those powers begin or end.

Unfortunately Doc and our Chief Justice are AWOL at the moment. I could summon the Director of Culinary Arts but I'm not sure what he can do for you unless you are craving a souffle right now? Let me know if you are.

Patience my good man, I'm sure there is a hefty lawsuit here waiting for you. You may be the largest landowner on OTI when this ordeal is over. I of course leave that to our esteemed Chief Justice.

by Guest Sun Jan 29, 2017 4:22 pm

I will be patient. I worry Doc may be ice fishing and I don't have that much time. They are threatening water boarding. Wait a minute he can't be ice fishing it's not cold enough for ice.

by **billg315** Sun Jan 29, 2017 5:07 pm

I was just contacted and asked to address an emergent matter, the detention of syosnow at JFK Airport. This is an issue that is very complex as it implicates matters larger than our island, but let me make clear where OTI's Justice System stands in this matter.
THIS HONORABLE COURT ORDERS AS FOLLOWS:
First, the millennial in the ski mask who struck syos is hereby charged with a crime. Not for the assault but for being a millennial, which I increasingly am coming to believe is in more cases than not, in and of itself criminal.
Second, all protestors at JFK are ordered to disperse and not to return until they each individually write a 100-page essay on immigration history in the United States that must demonstrate an understanding of: historical immigration quotas, legal immigration procedure, the routine and sometimes prolonged detention for vetting and financial payments of European immigrants at Ellis Island in the late 19th/early 20th century; the various periods of U.S. history where additional immigration restrictions have been imposed; the definition of the words: border, security, laws, illegal, legal, customs (noun), visa, passport, citizenship; and a complete understanding of the many existing border security measures - including walls - that have been in place on the mainland for decades that nobody seemed to think were inappropriate until somebody, ahem, suggested not creating them from scratch but actually making them more effective.
Third, syos is hereby ordered RELEASED from custody EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, and granted sanctuary on OTI from both the decreasing snow threats on the mainland and the continued actions of the seemingly never-ending list of ass-hat protests taking place, all of which may drive ME to the Sanitarium.
Respectfully submitted,
Billg
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

by Guest Sun Jan 29, 2017 5:49 pm

Billg135. You are my hero. Just let me know how many coconuts I owe. The protesters and their lawyers are quaking in their boots I can assure you. Already I see an increase in their anxiety levels. As far as Doc goes I hope the fish are biting. He's MIA

by **sroc4** Sun Jan 29, 2017 5:57 pm

billg315 wrote:I was just contacted and asked to address an emergent matter, the detention of syosnow at JFK Airport. This is an issue that is very complex as it implicates matters larger than our island, but let me make clear where OTI's Justice System stands in this matter.
THIS HONORABLE COURT ORDERS AS FOLLOWS:
First, the millennial in the ski mask who struck syos is hereby charged with a crime. Not for the assault but for being a millennial, which I increasingly am coming to believe is in more cases than not, in and of itself criminal.
Second, all protestors at JFK are ordered to disperse and not to return until they each individually write a 100-page essay on immigration history in the United States that must demonstrate an understanding of: historical immigration quotas, legal immigration procedure, the routine and sometimes prolonged detention for vetting and financial payments of European immigrants at Ellis Island in the late 19th/early 20th century; the various periods of U.S. history where additional immigration restrictions have been imposed; the definition of the words: border, security, laws, illegal, legal, customs (noun), visa, passport, citizenship; and a complete understanding of the many existing border security measures - including walls - that have been in place on the mainland for decades that nobody seemed to think were inappropriate until somebody, ahem, suggested not creating them from scratch but actually making them more effective.
Third, syos is hereby ordered RELEASED from custody EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, and granted sanctuary on OTI from both the decreasing snow threats on the mainland and the continued actions of the seemingly never-ending list of ass-hat protests taking place, all of which may drive ME to the Sanitarium.
Respectfully submitted,
Billg
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

Bill. This is pure genius. That is all.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 29, 2017 6:34 pm

A visit from the Emperor and the Vice Emperor all in the same week this is unprecedented. And all immediately after Billg is named the Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor. I hope there is no plot to influence the aforementioned to leave his position at OTI and convert him into an "Advanced Forecaster"? We already lost a member of the royal family (Mugs) through proselytizing by Mainlanders and by God we cannot let it happen again.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler
Current acting Director of Tourism and Immigration

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 29, 2017 8:18 pm

Due to a crisis at the Sanitarium this afternoon which I will not elaborate on, I was unable to keep track of the rapid developments in the matters described above but see that Treasury Director CP and Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor Billg have the matter of syos well under control.A visit by the Vice Emperor is truly magnanimus and extraordinary as well.After I ponder all of these rapid developments, I will come up with a through addition to the comments posted above.

I share some of CP's concerns of the indoctrination of our former King Mugsy into an advanced forecaster.His complete lack of communication or visiting here is distressing to say the least!

by **Math23x7** Sun Jan 29, 2017 8:44 pm

Director of Technology or Director of the Budget? Hmm, if I assume the role as the Director of the Budget, do I have to stay within limits? I mean, if there is a country we know that can drive the debt to $20 trillion, would I be able to do the same? Razz

That being said, there are quite a bit on the budget, perhaps the top priority being subsidizing the Sanitarium. Since OTI's inception in March 2014, it seems that not only do we need a comfortable Sanitarium, we also need it to have room for expansion as we get more visitors each winter.

Of course, the budget also takes into account watching over the boundaries of the island for those that are unwanted including (but not limited to): Schmaltzie, laular, the CPK zookeeper, and select members of the CPK Conservancy. They are on OTI's most wanted list. The border patrol must enforce customs procedures and interrogate anyone who may have links to those on the aforementioned list.

One last thing that needs to be factored in to the budget: infrastructure! This is something that ex-king Mugs would applaud me for. It seems people think about it only when it goes wrong, but our structures need to be maintained to appeal to visitors. Otherwise, they will turn away from our magnificent island.

Of course, I could be the Director of Technology as I know how things on this forum work. I pointed out recently that once this thread gets to 1100 posts, it will split in two (which recently happened to the official Long Range 13.0 thread on the mainland) Eventually the time will come where this needs to be addressed, which may be sooner rather than later. And as far as visitors, aka "Views" which I had previously been under citizens arrest for, if you want to cut down on it, it needs either an admin or moderator from the mainland to lock the thread once the snow threats disperse in early spring. When I sound the all clear for no more snow until next fall, you will know what to do.

Anyway, there is my insight as to which role suits me. I would like to know what you guys think? I was not a founding member. I did not come into OTI until January 2015, ten months after it was founded. Plus, I am busy with other things IRL, especially now that we are in the busy season at my job where I work days I normally don't work.

I hope to hear from all of you soon.

Mike

by **billg315** Sun Jan 29, 2017 9:10 pm

I see no reason Mike can't be Director of a combined Office of Technology and Budget. Our island's budget is dependent on technology (dare I say the whole island is a form of technology) therefore there is a logical link. And by combining the offices we will achieve efficiencies lowering our budget, giving Mike more mangos to invest in critical infrastructure.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 29, 2017 9:52 pm

billg315 wrote:I see no reason Mike can't be Director of a combined Office of Technology and Budget. Our island's budget is dependent on technology (dare I say the whole island is a form of technology) therefore there is a logical link. And by combining the offices we will achieve efficiencies lowering our budget, giving Mike more mangos to invest in critical infrastructure.

It sounds like Mike has a lot on his plate right now from the slave masters on the Mainland and I don't think giving him 2 Directorships simultaneously would be prudent at this time.

With that said the Director of Budgeting is overseen by the Director of the Treasury, yours truly, so with that in mind I propose that Mike should be named the Director of Technology and when time allows he can assist me at Treasury but without any additional title and job duties to burden him. The last thing we need is the young man (Mike) to blow a gasket and go "Syos" on OTI. I use the phrase strictly as the OTI phrase meaning losing all control and mental capacity, not a reference to the individual Syos. We are still repairing the Coconut room from the last citizen to go Syos on OTI and the damage was catastrophic, not just to the room itself but to all patrons present at the time. One poor women who was visiting on extended Visa received 21 banana wounds, 3 mango bruises, 4 coconut abrasions and 6 palm leaf burns. I was there minutes afterward and it's a sight I don't want to relive ever again. The poor woman has not consumed any tropical fruit to this day.

Additional comments as always are welcome.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler
Current acting Director of Tourism and Immigration

PS - It's my busiest time of year and I've spent far to much time taking care of OTI business today. For the foreseeable future I will be vacationing at the Snow Queens Sand Castle. As always she will be clad in her bikini made of snow and I will have the heat on high. Draw your own conclusions.

by **billg315** Sun Jan 29, 2017 10:26 pm

Heavens to Murgatroyd, I agree 100 percent CP, we DO NOT want anyone, most of all young Mike, going Syos in the Coconut Room! I therefore endorse your recommendation. My Court still has the video of that unfortunate incident you reference from the Coconut Room. It is chilling even for an esteemed member of the Court as myself. I share it now only because it's important to know what can happen when someone goes bananas, or goes syos, in the Coconut Room:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKXpSyjfIik&sns=em

Respectfully Submitted,
Billg315
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

by **docstox12** Mon Jan 30, 2017 5:53 am

Parliament has discussed extensively and comes to agreement with Treasury Director CP and Chief Justice Billg on the promotion of Math to Director of Technology.His Mainland duties proclude the adoption of a second title at this juncture.If Math should so choose, he can render assistance to Treasury Director CP, especially now with the bannana , coconut and mango crops ripening and ready for accounting and shipment.CP, with his assistant Snow Queen, will undoubtedly be very busy these coming weeks dealing with this critical Island source of revenue.

Parliament also distributes funds to Chief Justice Billg for a thorough investigation of the "going Syos" incident at the Coconut Room,( as per Billg's evidentiary film).We at Parliament suspect the incident may have been incited by a global warmist sympathizer spreading literature to patrons that inflamed the already despondent snow lovers escaping from the Mainland snow derangement conditions.It is imperative that this type of incitement by thoroughly excised and eliminated as we are trying our best to provide our Mainland Tourists with a happy environment.

The infrastructure projects CP has endorsed are fully agreed to once the massive funds as per the lawsuit settlement from Chief Justice Billg's case pending against Mainland snow undermeasurement entities comes in.

Lastly, may I add on a personal note as your Director of Parliament, that I am exceedingly proud of the events that have occurred in our wonderful OTI.The addition of wonderful people plus visits from our Emperor and Vice Emperor.Much hard work has been done these last three years in infrastructure and governmental matters to make OTI a proud contributor to the Emperor Frank's domain.

by Sponsored content